Saturday, July 29, 2006

Beards: When the razors fail...



For the past week or so I have taken the journey of not shaving. Needless to say it was itchy, annoying and grew in little spurts here and there. It was not the full beard that all men love to have. In fact I would go as far as to say it was not the 'in' thing to do. Having said that, I have learned a thing or two about beards that I would love to share with the world.

Numero Uno: Beards are a commodity. It may come as a surprise to you but women cannot grow beards, or rather they choose not to grow beards. I personally have heard the legend of a 'bearded lady' whom roams the forests of British Columbia but I think that may just be a tourist trap. Now as I was saying, beards are a commodity. Even the youth here at camp looked at me with awe as I struted about with my semi-manly, half-hearted beard. It was great. And, for your information, all women found me utterly repulsive. Score one for the big guy. (thumbs up)

Number Two: Misquitoes don't touch beards. As all other areas of my body were sucked dry of blood, I found it nice and relaxing to have my lower facial area not effected by the vampires.

Three: Beards save time. And time is money, so do it. No, really, I saved like five minutes a day and that times 7 is almost entire episode of House. It was sweet.

Now at this point you may be wondering: "Why would Pat blog about beards? That is a really boring topic. I mean what is he thinking. He's an idiot." But folks the mundane and beardly things of this world are more interesting than: Janet.

P the P

(I would like to note at this point that Janet spent the entire time that I blogged this trying to get me to write it about her. I have achieved this mission.)

For more information on beards check out your public library or vist www.beards.org.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Power...

I awoke the next day. It was oddly quiet and there was no one around. I peaked out from under my blanket. I was overly hot that morning so I went to turn the fan on. It lay still and I flicked the switch. It still layed still. Frustrated with the fan and the heat I decide to turn on the tap and brush my teeth. Strangely I found that no water came and my teeth were not about to be properly cleaned. I shrugged and carried on.

I moved up stairs and found that the day had long begun. It was after all 5 pm. I must have slept a long time. It turns out my radio wasn't on either. Something was really off. I decided that a nice cold pepsi late in the afternoon would do me good. So I reached into the darkened refridgerator and found only warm pepsi. I drank it anyways cause hey, I like the stuff.

The entire building was as quiet as a mouse and I figured apropriately I would check my email and maybe write in my blog. Oddly enough it seemed the computer had broken or something because it wouldn't turn on. By this point I was a little up set so I looked at the clock and realised that it was 5:00 am so I went back to bed....

I love power outtages...

RRWRR RWWR RWrRR

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Midnight never seemed so early and morning never seemed so late

I knew not what to say with my slight music playing and the sound of a photo copier

You see midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I thought of screaming really loud and waking up the camp...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I thought of days when I slept til noon and (LAN) partied til 3...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I thought of friends of old who made me laugh and taught me life...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I relived adventures of useless quest and events I seldom forget...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I dreamt of the future and pondered the past...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

I lived in the moment and let myself just be...

When midnight seemed so early and morning seemed so late.

It is all well and good and a great place to be...

When midnight seems so early and morning seems so late.

But in the end when all is said and done I'd just rather be in bed...

When midnight seems so early and morning seems so late.

a P the P original.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

The Phone was for Both of Us


As I ran I thought for sure she was going to beat me. I knew I wasn't a runner and as my flipflops made a WHACK WHACK louder than anything I"ve ever heard, I figured it was over. I bolted up the stairs, which is an out of character things to do, and saw her as she moved towards the phone. I knew I had lost. She knew I had lost. You see the phone was for both of us. But then I realised while she was walking toward the phone I could just reach over the counter and grab it.

It turns out.... I won.

My sister had called and well, I won. It was pretty sweet. Jen and I talked about the race and how I had won. And we talked about my blog which was neat because I didn't know she read it.

I won.

Ptmn th pt

Saturday, July 01, 2006

The Art of Nothingness


Today I have nothing to do. And I plan to do it well. This is a good things and a proud endeavor.

Some people think blogs are useless... They should read this post. It had everything to do with everything.